


Math Porn

by sunflower1343



Category: Finder no Hyouteki | Finder Series
Genre: Math Kink
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-25
Updated: 2017-05-25
Packaged: 2018-11-04 23:38:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 682
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11001387
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sunflower1343/pseuds/sunflower1343
Summary: 83% of all Viewfinder lovers think Asami is totally hot...





	Math Porn

**Author's Note:**

> I told a friend I loved numbers and she called it Math Porn. That was all this little fic needed to be born. Written for ingenius_inc, September 2008.
> 
> ~~~~~~~~~~~

"We need to reduce spending in the research branch."

Kirishima tried not to fidget. It was unprofessional to fidget.

"If we laid off the Osaka group..."

_Say it. Say it._

"... No. They're the ones that came up with that way to easily remove the fingerprinting trigger guards from the new Rugers."

_Dammit._

"But the group in Kyoto is worthless, don't you think?"

He tried not to be eager. He tried to stay rational. Asami-sama was best served by cool heads. All heads. He took a deep, slow breath.

"Asami-sama, they've given us some small advances in terms of bioweapons antidotes. I think it's too soon to release them."

"Well then, Kirishima, how can we reduce spending by, say, 1.2 million US per month in that area?"

"Do you have your heart set on that number, Asami-sama?" _More. Please. More._

Asami shrugged slightly and leaned back, reading the report in his lap. "No. But 1.2 million over a year would almost provide the 15 million needed to start up an operation off the coast of Peru. The 15 would cover the initial 5 million purchase of the island in question, including approximately 1.5 million in bribes.

 _Yes. Yes!_ "Of course. That's understood. And the remaining 10 million?"

"Approximately one third will go toward security, another third toward building the facility, and the last third for hiring the troops and personnel."

Kirishima was feeling dizzy. He tried to stiffen every body part but _that_ one. _That_ one didn't need any help. "And the profits you're expecting to see?"

"Ah," murmured Asami, "now that's the beautiful part. Statistics show a rise in gun ownership among 18-25 year old males in the last three years of over 150%. Among legal gun owners the prices have almost doubled. Illegal shipments have increased in value over 350%."

A soft moan caused Asami to glance up. He seemed amused by what he'd been reading. Kirishima mentally sewed his lips together.

Asami leaned forward. "And 14.7%..."

Kirishima gnawed his cheek.

"Of the nearly 1500 criminal organizations going through Peru's 3 biggest ports..."

He held his breath trying not to explode.

"Have been willing to pay an average surcharge, on top of the 350%, of 50% more for a guaranteed supply of untraceable quality weapons, meaning a profit of... Are you alright? You look a little red. Perhaps you need a break. I've been working you. Hard."

 _What was that? What did he say?_ Kirishima tried to pull his thoughts together.

Asami lowered his voice intimately. "You know Kei, 23.9% of men aged 35-45 suffer from 85% of all the health related problems – wherever are you going?"

"It must be the fish I had for lunch!" Kirishima ran out the door and hit the closest toilet, locking the door and plunging his hand into his pants, the merest touch enough to make him explode across the stall's wall. He leaned back against the cold metal, breathing heavily. It was almost as if he knew, the bastard, but there was no way. Who would guess such a thing?

He wiped his hands in disgust. At least he'd have more self-control the rest of the afternoon.

As he approached Asami's office door, he spotted a new report in his in basket. _Oh God no._ The projections for the profits from the new Russian factory. His hands shook slightly as he picked it up. He knew he should wait but he couldn't help it. It was like a drug.

"Asami-sama." He strode through the door. "My apologies. But some new numbers have come in."

"Have they? Will you attempt to remain in the room this time while we read them?"

He blushed. "Of course, Asami-sama. My apologies."

Asami waved them off. "There's nothing wrong with indulging you on occasion, so long as it doesn't interfere with your work." He smirked. "We just need to work on your discipline. Now, why don't you stand there, very, very still, while we talk about this report?"

 _He knew._

He shivered. Odds were it was going to be a long, long afternoon.

~end~


End file.
